Stepping back

This post is very random. On my to do list I had a review of a face scrub scheduled, but clearly I'm not writing about that at all right now. In the past few months there have been a lot of changes in my life, which I guess have been partly reflected in the content of RF blog. I have this terrible character flaw is that once I get excited about something, like a new subject or a hobby of any sort it becomes almost all consuming. I will research it to death, getting my hands on as many books as I can, reading blog posts and watching videos with different view points so I get a better understanding of a subject as a whole. The downside is that not only am I not noticing the passage of time and spending most of my free time glued to the computer, while still in my pyjamas, I'm completely exhausting myself.

The weirdest things is when reading books about nutrition and suddenly realising that I am hungry, instead of making myself a proper meal, in my eagerness to get back to it all I'm more likely to just grab myself several slices of bread topped with marmalade. Which isn't really how I would normally eat. It's like I loose all sense of perspective. I firmly believe that we should never stop learning, but when it comes to my own self-education I'm not at all patient. I have so many questions and I want to have all the answers straight away. It's great having all this information at the touch of the button, trouble is trying to figure out the quality of knowledge. It is rather frustrating when so many opinions are presented as facts, and sometimes really flawed arguments can appear rather convincing due to the charisma and charm of the speaker. 

After spending yet another day of watching You Tube videos in hopes of finding what I am looking for, I realised I need to take a step back. Not only am I not getting anywhere fast, my brain is pretty much giving up. Mr RF often makes fun of the shows that I watch on TV or Netflix, he thinks they are, to put it politely, not very intelligent. That might be true, but honestly they are one of very few things that let my brain stop working overtime. As ridiculous as it sounds, even when I'm walking in a park deer spotting, at the back of my mind I'm coming up with blog ideas, schedules, shopping lists, so while my body is enjoying a leisurely stroll and my eyes are getting a rest from the computer screen, my brain  is still going a thousand miles per hour. 

There is a lot of emphasis on working hard, being active, planning for the future. There isn't much focus on simply being and experiencing the present. It is so crazy how quickly time moves regardless of what it is you are doing, but if you never stop and take a step back to have a look at the picture as a whole, you never really notice if what it is you are spending your time on is really worth while. I know today has been a complete waist in the sense that I did not achieve anything I was hoping to, nor was I able to get any of the answers I  was looking for. But I did learn something, that I don't need to devote any more time to this particular dilemma. It just isn't relevant. It is such a relief to be able to move on. Now my brain can work overtime on something entirely different. All I had to do to come to this conclusion is having a walk in the park, while I was enjoying the scenery my mind was processing everything I was exposed to through the day, and things just became blindingly obvious. However, if I just carried on researching undoubtedly it would have taken me many more hours to come to the same conclusion.

Have you ever experienced something similar? Do you consciously try to give yourself time to reflect without distractions? Let me know in the comments.